The one redeeming feature of this show...Holy crap, On the Lot is bad. Historically bad. I'll tell you what--the director of On the Lot should be kicked off his own show, because this show is a friggin tutorial on how NOT to entertain people.
And what's really sad is that the first two episodes were actually good. Really good. Tell-your-friends good. I was in. This show had tremendous potential. Then they pulled the bait and switch on me and drove the show off the tracks, into the gutter.
Let's run down the points here:
- Let's start with episode 3: THEY COMPLETELY SKIPPED IT. That's right, they ended episode 2 by setting up the next episode, then completely blew that episode off so they could jump to a new "American Idol" style format, where the audience (what's left of them) votes via phone. Dude, what happened to episode 3? I was looking forward to that. Suddenly some of the contestants are missing, the show format has changed, and no one knows what happened. Which brings me to...
- the new format: it sucks.
Look, it works fine for American Idol but frankly it sucks for a show about film making. The movies are fine, but far from the most interesting part of the show. People want to see the moviemaking process, not just vote on the final results.
- the Host: ok, this is the one thing they got right. Sure, she can barely recite her lines and her jokes fall flat. You know what is not flat? Her fantastic RACK. Give the wardrobe person a raise for constantly putting those tits front and center.
- the Judges: My god, Carrie Fisher is a disaster. For someone billed as a screenwriter, her advice is worthless. Porn stars could give better filmmaking advice. And what happened to Ratner? Brett Ratner was a judge on the first two episodes, then mysteriously disappeared. Was he canned? did he see how bad the show was going to be and quit? I think you have to assume he was fired--would anyone really walk out on a tv show produced by Spielberg? As for Garry Marshall, the guy just sounds like a senile grandpa who got lost in the studio.
So now we have guest judges every week- this week? Michael Bay, who coincidentally has a movie coming out July 2nd.
People, you have the director of PEARL FUCKING HARBOR giving directing tips. WTF? This is like Lindsay Lohan teaching Driver's Ed. And yet, strangely, he made the most sense- that's how bad the regular judges are.
- the contestants: Is this really the best America has to offer? No wonder guys like Michael Bay make it in Hollywood. Sure, there are definitely talented directors here, but some of these movies are just flat out horrible. Really, how good can a 3 minute movie made in 5 days on no sleep be? 12-year-old kids are making better films with a bottle of diet coke and a pack of mentos. These films would be completely buried on Youtube, and it doesn't help that we know almost nothing about these people, and don't even get to see any footage of the making of their movies each week. Is movie making really that boring? Its impossible to care about these crappy movies without any backstory on the making of the film, which was by far the most interesting part of the first two episodes.
- finally, does EVERYTHING have to be a product placement opportunity? Half the movies feature closeup shots of the same exact Verizon phone- was that really a coincidental creative choice by the directors? Ford is beating me over the head with blantant product shots as well- Hey Ford, how about spending less money on advertising and more money making better cars?
Bottom line- this show had potential, but obviously the ratings were low because they keep changing the show trying to generate interest. They are only making it worse and losing the few viewers they had in the first place. Way to go, Fox.
No seriously- kick the director off his own show.
